In many ways not much has changed since Lady Chatterley’s Lover was published. Today sex is more discussed openly. However, there are still topics of proper healthy relationships that are still being talked about today that are the same as Connie’s relationship problems.
Lady Chatterley has the habit of just lying there during sex and passively thinking nothing of it. Connie is not being a part and concious of the sex she has with Mellors.
“She lay still, in a kind of sleep, always in a kind of sleep. The activity, the orgasm was his, all his; she could strive for herself no more. Even the tightness of his arms round her, even the intense movement of his body, and the springing seed in her, was a kind of sleep, from which she did not begin to rouse till he had finished and lay softly panting against her breast.”(94)
Just like in Don Jon, today, there is a disconnect with being present in a relationship. With some women fantasizing about this unattainable love story of an ideal relationship and some men growing up to believe that porn is better than sex, or vice versa.
I’m not sure is Lady Chatterley and Clifford’s relationship would work despite his war wound. They seem to have problems that are not only from having Clifford wounded from the war. Just because their intellect is equal doesn’t make equal in other ways.
When Connie has an orgasm with Mellors and is satisfied at the same time as him they are equal. Lady Chatterley wants something equal and having an equal sex life with Mellors an equal understand of their bodies and nature does not denounce their lack of equal intellect. This way they are one and they work together rather than being completely equal. They have this true sense of self like Adam and Eve after they have sinned.
“And they lay and knew nothing, not even of each other, both lost. Till at last he began to rouse and become aware of his defenseless nakedness, and she was aware that his body was loosening its clasp on her. He was coming apart; but in her breast she felt she could not bear him to leave her uncovered. He must cover her now for ever.”(109)
This is what the protagonist Jon Don failed to learn having only been focused on the objectification of his porn.
This topic is persistent from Modernist times, but, it is unusually different since Lady Chatterley’s Lover was published because we have these film works accessible from the internet.
Though time has passed and this book is not as scandalous as it once was this discussion is very much still continuing and not closed or considered a decent and modest topic.
Lawrence, D.H. Lady Chatterley’s Lover. New York: Dover Publications, 2006.